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=[C]=Maj_Dick=[C]=
=[C]=TWL Anti-Cheat Team


Number of posts : 2883
Age : 47
Location : Newport, TN
Registration date : 2008-01-14

PostSubject: Daily Joke   Wed Mar 17, 2010 6:04 pm

I would like to try some stimulus for the forums by enacting a "daily joke" thread. anyone contribute:


A train hits a bus filled with Catholic school girls and they all
perish.
They are in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates when St. Peter asks
the first girl, ” Tiffany, have you ever had any contact with a male
organ?
She giggles and shyly replies, “Well, I once touched the head of one
with the tip of my finger.”
St. Peter says, ” Okay, dip the tip of your finger in the Holy Water and
pass through the gate.”
St. Peter asks the next girl the same question, “Jennifer, have you
ever had any contact with a male organ?”
The girl is a little reluctant but replies, “Well, once I fondled and
stroked one.” St. Peter says, ” Okay, dip your whole hand in the Holy
Water and pass through the gate.”
All of a sudden, there is a lot of commotion in the line of girls.
One girl is pushing her way to the front of the line. When she reaches
the front
St.Peter says, “Reeva, What seems to be the rush?”
The girl replies, “If I’m going to have to gargle that Holy Water, I
want to do it before Jessica sticks her ass in it.”

_________________



The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil, is for good men to do nothing




We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me,
Shall be my brother
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=[C]=Gaz



Number of posts : 370
Age : 34
Location : Michigan
Registration date : 2009-10-07

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Wed Mar 17, 2010 6:15 pm

lol! lol!
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Baloo



Number of posts : 189
Age : 38
Location : Sweden
Registration date : 2009-05-04

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Wed Mar 17, 2010 7:45 pm

ass in the water...
I thought someone would have to drink the whole bowl or something
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http://www.megalomania.cc
=[C]= MrCDub



Number of posts : 2082
Age : 44
Location : Colorado USA
Registration date : 2008-02-05

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Wed Mar 17, 2010 11:09 pm

HAHAHAHA love it !
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=[C]=Bosse777=[C]=



Number of posts : 319
Age : 36
Location : Southern Oregon
Registration date : 2007-11-16

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 2:51 am

A man go's to lunch by himself, and as soon as he sits down he pushes his spoon off the table on accident. The waiter hears the spoon drop and quickly walks by and pulls a clean spoon out of his apron and hands it to the man. The man is impressed by the quick action of the waiter and asks why he had a spoon in his apron, the water replied, there was a productivity company that came in about a week ago and did a study that found out the most dropped silverware in a restaurant is the spoon, so now everyone carries a spoon in their apron for such an occasion, it saves steps back to the kitchen, thus saving on labor. the man thought that was a great idea and then ordered. when the water brought the food to the man the man noticed a string hanging out below his apron and commented, "there is a string on you", the water then replied with a laugh, the same productivity company did another study that found out that employees spend a lot of time washing their hands after using the bathroom so we are saving time by tying a string around our weenies, so we can/ just grab the string and go! thus saving time and labor! The man thought this was strange but had a sweet tooth and ordered some icecream, as he ate his icecream he had to ask the waiter how he got his weenie back in his pants without touching it? the waiter replied that they didnt tell them that part so he just uses the spoon!
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{S@NDM@N}-ACI-



Number of posts : 3369
Age : 104
Location : Canada
Registration date : 2009-01-02

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 2:59 am

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=[C]= MrCDub



Number of posts : 2082
Age : 44
Location : Colorado USA
Registration date : 2008-02-05

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 8:26 am

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=[C]=Gaz



Number of posts : 370
Age : 34
Location : Michigan
Registration date : 2009-10-07

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 10:17 am

lol Ewwwww
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=[C]=Maj_Dick=[C]=
=[C]=TWL Anti-Cheat Team


Number of posts : 2883
Age : 47
Location : Newport, TN
Registration date : 2008-01-14

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 2:30 pm

One morning a woman was walking
out of her front door, when she notices a strange little man
at the
bottom of her garden.


"You're a goblin," she
says, "I caught you and you owe me three wishes!". So the
goblin replies "OK, you caught me fair and square, what's
your
first wish?". The woman stops and thinks for a second, "I
want a huge mansion to live in.", goblins replies "OK,
you've got it.". Woman again thinks it over, "My second
wish is a Mercedes." "OK, you've got that too."
"My last wish is a million dollars!". The goblin then says
"OK, you've got it. But to make your wishes come true you
have
to have sex all night with me." "OK then, if that's what
it takes..."


Next morning the little
man wakes
the woman up.


"Tell me," says the
man, "how old are you?" "I'm 27", she replies


"Fuck me", says the
man, "27 and you still believe in goblins"

_________________



The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil, is for good men to do nothing




We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me,
Shall be my brother
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=[C]=Maj_Dick=[C]=
=[C]=TWL Anti-Cheat Team


Number of posts : 2883
Age : 47
Location : Newport, TN
Registration date : 2008-01-14

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 2:33 pm

A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a
ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and
demands her
to open the vault. She says "But sir, its just a
sperm bank!", "I don't care, open it now!!!" he
replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are
all the
sperm samples. The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples
and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm
samples???" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back.
"That one there, drink that one as well.", so the nurse
drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man
takes off
his ski mask and it turns out to be her husband. he says, "See honey - that wasnt so hard was it?."

_________________



The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil, is for good men to do nothing




We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me,
Shall be my brother
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http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=657101831&ref=pro
=[C]=Gaz



Number of posts : 370
Age : 34
Location : Michigan
Registration date : 2009-10-07

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 3:29 pm

Lmao!!! Very Happy i like jokes!
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=[C]=PAPITOMONO



Number of posts : 4022
Age : 41
Location : Santiago, Chile.
Registration date : 2007-03-23

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 3:43 pm

=[C]=Maj_Dick=[C]= wrote:
A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a
ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and
demands her
to open the vault. She says "But sir, its just a
sperm bank!", "I don't care, open it now!!!" he
replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are
all the
sperm samples. The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples
and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm
samples???" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back.
"That one there, drink that one as well.", so the nurse
drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man
takes off
his ski mask and it turns out to be her husband. he says, "See honey - that wasnt so hard was it?."

ROLFLMAO!!!

Does some funny shit...

Hey, i do that with Sixpack, i point hes head with my M16 in game and tell him, swallow it, you German puta...

_________________


Hey, i might not play golf like Tiger Woods, but i can sure fuck like he does...

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=[C]=Bosse777=[C]=



Number of posts : 319
Age : 36
Location : Southern Oregon
Registration date : 2007-11-16

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Fri Mar 19, 2010 5:35 pm

so this is more of a quick prank that i pull on the new guys at work

so in the heat of the moment during the dinner rush when they are a bit frazzled anyway on the persons first day of work, I look at them and point with a great sence of ergency and yell


"Hey you, Go to the Walk in cooler and grab me a pint of PIDGEON MILK!!! and hurry"















usually takes them about 3-5 mins of looking to figure it out birds lay eggs and dont make milk!

LOLOLOLOLOL its a good icebreaker and a good way to set the tone of the workplace, because we like to have fun at work, it just makes it better.
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=[C]=Maj_Dick=[C]=
=[C]=TWL Anti-Cheat Team


Number of posts : 2883
Age : 47
Location : Newport, TN
Registration date : 2008-01-14

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Sat Mar 20, 2010 3:41 pm

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender
for a case of beer, any kind except Schlitz. The bartender
says,
"What's wrong with Schlitz, don't you like it? The man says,
"I hate that shit". Last night I drank a whole case of
Schlitz and blew chunks. The bartender says, "You drink a
case
of any beer you're going to blow chunks". You don't
understand
said the man, Chunks is my dog.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


A guy has been asking the prettiest girl in
town for a date and finally she agrees to go out with him.
He takes
her to a nice restaurant and buys her a fancy dinner with
expensive
wine. On the way home, he pulls over to the side of the road
in a
secluded spot. They start necking and he's getting pretty
excited.
He starts to reach under her skirt and she stops him, saying
she's a
virgin and wants to stay that way.

"Well, okay," he says, "how about a blow job?"
"Yuck!" she screams. "I'm not putting that thing in
my mouth!"

He says, "Well, then, how about a hand job?" "I've
never done that," she says. "What do I have to do?"

"Well," he answers, "remember when you were a kid and
you used to shake up a Coke bottle and spray your brother
with
it?" She nods. "Well, it's just like that."

So, he pulls it out and she grabs hold of it and starts
shaking it.
A few seconds later, his head flops back on the headrest,
his eyes
close, snot starts to run out of his nose, wax blows out of
his ear
and he screams out in pain.

"What's wrong?!" she cries out.

"Take your thumb off the end!!"

_________________



The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil, is for good men to do nothing




We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me,
Shall be my brother
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http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=657101831&ref=pro
=[C]=Gaz



Number of posts : 370
Age : 34
Location : Michigan
Registration date : 2009-10-07

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Sat Mar 20, 2010 4:21 pm

Omg hahahahahahahaha that girl will never do anything sexual ever again.
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Dunpeal
PR Team Member


Number of posts : 1138
Age : 29
Location : Orange Park, Fl
Registration date : 2007-02-14

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Sun Mar 21, 2010 12:11 am

I like the first one and the coke bottle one. I'm disappointed that pidgeons don't producd milk.
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=[C]=PAPITOMONO



Number of posts : 4022
Age : 41
Location : Santiago, Chile.
Registration date : 2007-03-23

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Sun Mar 21, 2010 1:14 am

Dunpeal wrote:
I like the first one and the coke bottle one. I'm disappointed that pidgeons don't producd milk.

Yeah, you´re disappointed because you don´t have where to suck

_________________


Hey, i might not play golf like Tiger Woods, but i can sure fuck like he does...

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BLCKHWKDWN22



Number of posts : 66
Age : 29
Registration date : 2008-11-22

PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Sun Apr 18, 2010 2:35 am

=[C]=Bosse777=[C]= wrote:
A man go's to lunch by himself, and as soon as he sits down he pushes his spoon off the table on accident. The waiter hears the spoon drop and quickly walks by and pulls a clean spoon out of his apron and hands it to the man. The man is impressed by the quick action of the waiter and asks why he had a spoon in his apron, the water replied, there was a productivity company that came in about a week ago and did a study that found out the most dropped silverware in a restaurant is the spoon, so now everyone carries a spoon in their apron for such an occasion, it saves steps back to the kitchen, thus saving on labor. the man thought that was a great idea and then ordered. when the water brought the food to the man the man noticed a string hanging out below his apron and commented, "there is a string on you", the water then replied with a laugh, the same productivity company did another study that found out that employees spend a lot of time washing their hands after using the bathroom so we are saving time by tying a string around our weenies, so we can/ just grab the string and go! thus saving time and labor! The man thought this was strange but had a sweet tooth and ordered some icecream, as he ate his icecream he had to ask the waiter how he got his weenie back in his pants without touching it? the waiter replied that they didnt tell them that part so he just uses the spoon!



that is sooo fucked up.. u kno only retards would do that shit so i guess gorilla would fall under that catorgory
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PostSubject: Re: Daily Joke   Today at 11:55 am

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